she kept yelling 'call me bella'
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
