I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Randomize