His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
now i know why i became what i already was.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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