How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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