Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
