I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize