just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Randomize