i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
