I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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