All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
