sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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