Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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