Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
