are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
