...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
This is classic penis vs brain.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
