the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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