Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
high people should be assigned attendants
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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