How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
