Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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