A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize