i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize