Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize