people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
