The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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