I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize