just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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