you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
