you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Come see our sink grown plant.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
