Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Randomize
