i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize