dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize