i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize