take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
