All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
