She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
