Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
