there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
