There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
