Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
