I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
