Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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