did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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