This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize