that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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