i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Girls should come with a carfax report
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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