Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
