I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
