I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
