Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
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