Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
