I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
and you fell through a lawn chair
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
